To make matters weirder, this penis post is a penis post about a penis post that I wrote for ATTN:: it’s about why straight men should become butt bumping bottom bros. What does that mean? Straight men need to start having anal sex.
No, I don’t mean they need to have it with their girl’s rear but dudes need to be penetrated. How much better would the world be if more men had something stuck in them? It would help make masculinity less fragile and would mean more men could empathize with what it feels like to have something go inside of you, by way of an orifice that isn’t a mouth. Maybe that would mean men would be less violent? That’s my theory: penetration leads to softer men. This is an important subject, clearly.
Anyway, I spoke with two doctors on the subject. While the entire story was a lot of fun to write and research, this was a standout moment:
As Dr. Milrod pointed out by email, a National Survey Of Family Growth survey revealed “44 percent of straight men reported having anal sex at least once in their lives.” Though this data doesn’t indicate what percentage of men have been on the receiving end of anal sex, Dr. Milrod said stigmas surrounding the act are dying.
“The stigma will most likely fade away as all varieties [of] sexual behavior become more accepted and Millennials disclose more of their behaviors openly in a variety of media,” she said.
Dr. Carol Queen — sexologist at Good Vibrations and author of The Sex & Pleasure Book — concurred via email with ATTN:. “It’s believed that anal is THE way gay men have sex, and that one man must take on the ‘female role.’ … It’s not just homophobia but also butt-phobia, because of the way that anal is associated with feces and dirt; though oddly, this stigma dissolves a bit when women are on the receiving end.”
Interesting. I mean, yes, butts are great but butts poop. Still: it’s fun to play around with our collective P-holes, to stick things in them and lick them and generally feel around down there.
The two doctors are great resources for butt stuff too: they explain how to talk to your partner about wanting to butt bump and safe practices. No, butt sex isn’t as easy as just sticking it in: you need some lube and you need some patience and you need a clear colon and, for straight couples, you need some toys. Being penetrated can be quite enlightening—and straight men certainly need some of that.