I’m going to try to be as brief as I possibly can this week.
Why? Because this pre-finale episode was such a fucking filler moment, illustrating that the show is happy to kneecap itself from actually having a sting, a point of view, a veritable bite in terms of deeming the talented from the untalented. I’m fairly sick of the new trend of “Love wins!” woven into the philosophy of a reality show, this late in the game. Save that for some Neil Patrick Harris special on ABC – not Drag Race.
Spoilers, obviously. Proceed with caution.
4. The Gamble Of Storylines Have Not Paid Off.
If we’ve learned anything from Kameron “Lipsync Assassain” Michaels, it’s that the producers took a gamble on the potential for a storyline for him only for that to never happen. I’m sorry that your father died, dude. But is that your storyline? Absolutely fucking not. Does that a queen make? No, not at all. Niceness and hotness are cool – but you know what’s better? Charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent. That was how this episode started and played through for Kameron: she doesn’t have a leg to stand on. She can sing, sure, but she is pedaling this tired ass vanilla shit while other, better, more exciting queens like The Vixen and Monet X Change and Mix Cracker (and even Monique Heart and Blair St. Clair!) could have served up something different with storylines of interest. Why is this show embracing white mediocrity so full throatedly? I doubt Kameron can pull of a Sasha “I’m overcoming my blandness!” type finale moment but, hey, we’ll have to wait and see.
3. “Eh”: The Challenge!
Remember the finale of All Stars 3? That was the better version of this episode. The choreography was cool and Todrick was at his best – but the finale looks themselves? The performance itself? The speeches? So boring. So blasé! Aquaria dressed up as The Vixen. Eureka had little pizazz to a great conceptual outfit that, as Raja and Raven noted in Photo Ruview, was better equipped for an entrance look. Kameron gave us the best of his worst. And Asia actually pulled something off, coming across like an aquamarine bathroom or Symmetra. Aquaria and Asia delivered in their performances while Eureka and Kameron very much stumbled to the finish.
2. Aquaria’s Game To Lose.
As far as potential winners, Aquaria should win only because it would elevate the show in a way that none of the other winners will offer the show. Aquaria, like Violet Chachki and Naomi Smalls before her, has such a high fashion relevance that her winning the show would potentially stymie her post-Drag Race career for a year. If she didn’t win? You can expect her to be jumping right into fashion work. She really did pull through this episode as a contender and, at 21, she clearly has the biggest future of the bunch ahead of her. (This said, I’m still team Asia. I just think that Aquaria would actually lend the show some credence that it’s been missing if Aquaria does indeed win.)
1. A Foursome Because No Gay Person Can Lose Anything On This Show Anymore.
Who went into this episode thinking anyone would get eliminated? None of us did. With the success of last year’s upsetting but enjoyable finale, they’re going to pull a similar lipsync battle in the end. As they should! That was fun and well done. Is this the four I would want to see compete in the end? No. Of course not. I still think the decision to save Kameron and Eureka from elimination over Asia and The Vixen was one of the biggest flubs of the season that it never recovered from. Alas. In 2018, Drag Race is more about saving the white dramaless shitter and sending a subpar four to the finale versus a taut, tight, thrilling two or three. Call me crazy for craving a little more legitimacy from my queens.
Reunion this upcoming week should be interesting and exciting. I haven’t seen or heard anything about what’s to come but I’m sure we can expect some fireworks. I hope! These last two or three episodes have been so painfully boring in that regard.
My ranking has gone unchanged, surprisingly.
Vanessa Vanjie Mateo
Kalorie Karbdashian Williams
Dusty Ray Bottoms
Blair St. Clair
Monet X Change
4. Kameron Michaels (Maintained. Fuck her.)
3. Eureka O’Hara (Maintained. Eh. She’s fine.)
2. Aquaria (Maintained. If she’s smart, she’d throw her game and lose so she can have an amazing post-Drag Race career.)
1. Asia O’Hara (Maintained. She is the most poised to handle the title well. She’s the queen we need now!)
Thoughts? I’m so ready for summer to start with the end of this damn show.