Loglines For Milan Fall 2016

Good god: are we done with fashion’s Fall season before Fall even comes yet? It feels like it is going forever and ever and ever. Finally: Milan. Here’s what we got.

• Versace: Sporty, squiggly sweat marks from the 1970s in subdued neons and black.
• Emilio Pucci: The above Versace collection but, you know, mountain-ish…and maybe actually better?
• Tod’s: “Hi, welcome to Tassels! Can I get you a leather tassel or a fur tassel? Oh, yes, of course: we do have a full menu available. Let me run and grab one for you, just a sec.”
• Etro: It Came From The Lilith Fair Revival
• Emporio Armani: A really, adorable screensaver for a 1996 Packard Bell where various pixelated shapes fall in baby pink, baby blue, and baby yellow—or a riff on this Kenzo sweater from last year.
• Diesel Black Gold: “Our name is Diesel Black Gold so we made black and blue and some white motocycle things. OK? Do you have a problem with that?”
• Moschino: The song “Burning Down The House” played on electric harpsichord.
• Byblos Milano: A 90s TV with the red, blue, green dots replaced to pink, blue, purple, orange, and black and sometimes it spits out yarn.
• Costume National: Even though it’s a beautiful, textured night sky, you still can’t tell where your waist is.
• Anteprima: “Yes, a flower honey, I see. Can you tie your bow now? No, tie the bow. Tie the bow and put on your coat. Please honey? We need hurry or we’ll be late for church.”
• Max Mara: A glass of champagne in a leather cup on a furry coaster on a table in Miami.
• Roberto Cavalli: Even though I have not seen it, this is a busier version of what I assume everyone in Only Lovers Left Alive wore.
• Gucci: That last Gucci collection I loved so much goes on a vision quest in Southeast Asia.
• Fay: A Western hangover after lusting too much after Gucci.
• No 21: Courtney loves it.
• Alberta Ferretti: A dark, silky twilight in the cemetery, full of ghost twins and living plants.
• Genny: Grecian disco dinner party,
• Alexander Lewis: “Wow, can you believe she used all her wishes to turn her lipstick into women? I would have asked for money.” (I quite like this, actually.)
• Simonetta Ravizza: It’s that time when the seventies is turning into the eighties and you are Faye Dunaway, cold, in New York City.
• Blugirl: Sheer, pseudo-sexy quakers.

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