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Momplicated

My friends Toby and Lindsay are pregnant. How exciting! The catch is that there isn’t just one baby coming: they’re both pregnant, married, and going to have two little people by the end of Summer.

It’s a wild story. It’s the type of LGBT tale that trends every few years at some point, where two women both end up getting pregnant because of the miracles of science (i.e., queer ingenuity as a result of our lacking the resources to get pregnant). To understand what this means, to get a sense of any struggles that come with with motherhood squared, I spoke with them about their pregnancies and the story is now up on PopSugar.

Here’s a peek at it.

The two found out Fleischman was pregnant the same week Lanciault was starting her efforts in November 2016. Instead of abandoning the work she had put into her own attempt to become pregnant, Lanciault attempted to get pregnant, too, via the same donor and method — and it worked. Quickly. She, too, was pregnant by December.

The two have just a three-week difference between their due dates — Lanciault is four months along, Fleischman is five — and found out about Lanciault’s pregnancy the week following the election of Donald Trump, which placed a shadow over the news.

“There was this level of ‘Is this the right thing to do? Bring children into this world?'” Lanciault says. “We were so fearful.”

It’s a really great story about two really great women whose journey to motherhood highlights similar paths LGBT parents have to take to have kids. Moreover, being queer in America today is clearly complicated given what’s going on in the government. How will being a queer parent be affected by President Trump? That’s a big part of the story (as is understanding and demystifying lesbian fertility).

Big shout out to my dear friend and editor Lindsay Miller who helped to finesse and guide the story to what you read today. It is quite a finessed story that we took a lot of time to perfect. Also thanks to Dr. Kristin Bendikson who is a wealth of information regarding fertility and is just a fabulous person to work with.

Now, if you ever have questions about queer parenting or what terms like IVI mean, do ask: I am a de facto expert on the subject.

Photo via.

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