Okay, Hello, Please Give Me This Chair

This is a fancy chair by Ralph Lauren. It is almost nineteen thousand dollars. It is just a lounge chair. But why is it so special? Surely it is not because the designer of it is related to one of the nation’s biggest candy entrepreneurs.

No, this chair—The RL—CF1—is actually made from the same stuff that you make planes and cars with: it’s made out of carbon fiber. According to Uncrate, the entire C-shaped shell of the chair is molded from a single piece of material. It’s super duper lightweight and seemingly fragile but—due to the nature of carbon fiber—is an extremely durable product. The simple floating leather seat is a wonderful contrast to the frame, too.

This chair is so luxe, dudes. It’s something that is just so opulent and so ridiculously expensive that it probably isn’t (Well, shouldn’t be.) real. I understand why it’s so expensive but there literally is no reason it is this expensive. For a chair? A single chair? That’s so fucking whack. That’s nearly all of what I have left on my student loan payments, not to mention what some people in some parts of the world make in a year (or lifetime!!). It’s beautiful, though. It’s such a minimalist beauty, polished and prepared to live in.

It should be $700, yes. Or you should get like a hundred of them for almost $19K. It’s pretty, though. I give it that. Perhaps the next incarnations (CF2? CF3? CF_???) will be cheaper? Anyway, please give me this chair, for free, because it is providing a very aggressive design erection that gets bigger and veinier the more I look at it. I would appreciate that. I would even sit in the chair as I pleasure myself, Mr. Lauren. Please consider this and let me know if this is possible.

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