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Ravens Are Goth Parrots

Birds are crazy, fam. They have disgusting ears, they’re horny, and – as if that wasn’t enough for you – some can fucking talk.

Yes, parrots can talk – but they are not alone. You know who else can talk? Ravens. Ravens. Those big black birds that look like flying death but are actually super fucking smart can talk. They are goth parrots.

I don’t remember how I stumbled upon this but I recent fell into a raven rabbit hole because there are a group of them that hang out on the trees in front of my apartment, cawing all morning or just watching me with their beady eyes. They’re creepy, they’re beautiful, they’re often confused for crows. The things make the most fucking bizarre sounds that range from cat moans to indiscernible clicks. They’re cool and seemingly omnipotent and make me think about how I never want to be alone in a room with one of them.

Strangely, in the world of raven “sounds” there is a subset of them who can mimic human speech. Literally. Watch these videos.

Ravens can fucking talk and it creeps me the fuck out. This is likely where the Edgar Allan Poe “The Raven” notion comes from which, of course, has been imitated for YouTube.

So where does this talking come from? And why? Mental Floss explains.

In captivity, ravens can learn to talk better than some parrots. They also mimic other noises, like car engines, toilets flushing, and animal and birdcalls. Ravens have been known to imitate wolves or foxes to attract them to carcasses that the raven isn’t capable of breaking open. When the wolf is done eating, the raven gets the leftovers.

These crafty ass motherfuckers. What delightful monsters.

The wild thing about this is that I didn’t know is that some people keep ravens as pets. People do some dumb shit but, then again, I can understand this considering these goth parrots are needed for amping up one’s aesthetic.

As we close a shitty week, enjoy this avian reprieve: ravens can talk and they are great goth parrots.

Photo via.

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