Sofia Coppola, The Person VS. Sofia Coppola, The Wine

Sofia Coppola is a movie director and the daughter of Francis Ford Coppola. Sofia, Francis Ford Coppola’s “tribute to his only daughter, Sofia,” is a collection of wines. I’m an occasional fan of both the artist and the drink but I’ve been wondering recently: is one better than the other?

It’s an intriguing question since—Well.—one makes movies and the other makes your drunk. Can they even go head-to-head? Probably. Let’s break it down, to see which is better: Sofia Coppola, the person, or Sofia Coppola, the wine.

The time period and years the Sofia has been involved.
SOFIA, THE PERSON: Sofia’s debut film—The Virgin Suicides—came out in 1999. This wasn’t her first film though: she made a few short films and acted in her father’s movies. She’s been making movies since then, her most recent being 2013’s The Bling Ring and the upcoming A Very Murray Christmas.
SOFIA, THE WINE: Funny, Sofia also debuted in 1999 as a gift from Francis to Sofia. The Coppola family has been making wine since the 1920s, a claim that seems somewhat dubious. But! Sofia seems to be more prolific, making and making and making since she debuted.

The design and general artistic direction of the Sofia.
SOFIA, THE PERSON: Sofia is known for her dreamy, lovely filmmaking. Her work typically involves characters whose privilege is being confronted in lustworthy locations. She can be dry and funny but mostly “dramatic” and racially unvaried.
SOFIA, THE WINE: A bit varied! The red and the rosé have very curvaceous teardrop shaped bottles but the blanc de blanc make up for it all coming in pink plastic wrap and a laser cut label—or pink-red cans.

How do these Sofias taste?
SOFIA, THE PERSON: Sofia has great taste in music. Her casting is always perfect. She’s pretty good with design, too. But she dated Wes Anderson and they make dueling movies: gross.
SOFIA, THE WINE: The red is fairly rare but it’s probably some Coppola byproduct which is fine, the rosé is not as good as most other (cheaper) rosés, and the blanc de blanc is like a dull nectar that is nice and affordable to drink week after week. The bubbles aren’t overly harsh and the wine won’t give your heartburn if you drink it all night.

Critical Acclaim
Reviews of the the Sofia.
SOFIA, THE PERSON: 70 / 100, pretty good but almost OK.
SOFIA, THE WINE: Rosé: four out of five stars. Blanc de blanc: four out of five stars. Basically, 80 / 100.

Persons commonly involved with the Sofia brand.
SOFIA, THE PERSON: Bill Murray, Kirsten Dunst, Steven Dorf, Elle Fanning, Scarlett Johanson Emma Watson: lots of bright young things, some of which she has launched or relaunched the career of. Also: her dad.
SOFIA, THE WINE: Sparkling, red, and rosé: the classics, I guess. But it started as the sparkling and flowered out into others, which could be seen as a deluding of the brand. Lest we forget an entire family of wines

How often is Sofia made?
SOFIA, THE PERSON: She hasn’t made a movie since 2013. She did direct the upcoming “special” Very Murray Christmas. Perhaps this is to be her finest work? Eh.
SOFIA, THE WINE: The sparkling wine is sold at almost every Kroger or Ralphs you go to. It is almost always in stock in bottle or in can form. The bottle costs as much as a movie ticket, too.

WINNER: Sofia Coppola, the wine. Mostly because of consistency! And frequency. And acclaim. It’s almost always good while Sofia, the person, is very divisive: you love her or you hate her. No one hates sparkling wine, though. That Sofia can do no wrong—especially if she comes in a rosé, too.

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