Ten Manly Salads For Men

Salads: we all love them—and by “we” I don’t mean “men.” They are such dainty meals! You have them and you are like, “Ugh: I’m so hungry.” and then you spend the rest of your day thinking about other food because, ugh, salad.

So what if I told you that there are salads for men? These are salads that fill and thrill and something about kill because men. Salads for men! Don’t feel like you skipped lunch anymore: have a man salad. Invite some dudes over for some beers—and eat a man salad. These are ten manly salads for men, men. Man!

10. Cobb Salad
A California classic. A secret protein delight. EAT COBB: eggs, avocado, tomato, chicken, onion, bacon bleu cheese. This is a salad with heart and by heart I mean stuff. There’s barely any lettuce here! #CobbLife

9. Tuna Salad
Yum, tuna. Fishy but not that fishy! You can putt this in a sandwich, too. There is no lettuce here (only mayonnaise) to deliver that TTY (Tuna To You). This is exactly the kind of of meal you would hope for from a can that has a sexy mermaid on it.

8. A Bottle Of Bac~Os
Bacon without the actual beef: “Defatted Soy Flour, Partially Hydrogenated Soybean Oil*, Salt, Water, Sugar, Natural and Artificial Flavor, Caramel Color and Red 40, Tocopherol (preservative).*adds a trivial amount of saturated fat.” YUM.

7. Grilled Iceberg With Buttermilk Ranch
Throw that head onto the grill. Ranch it up. Fill your mouth with that tangy milk char meal. Grilling.

6. Sliced Tomatoes With Salt
Sweet and savory salty sugar: tomatoes are vegetable candy. You can get small tomatoes or big tomatoes—and they all can be sliced. Sprinkle salt on them and you have a salad. You can also add cheese and leafs to them and, voila, man salad.

5. Protein Powder In A Bowl
No green here! Add water and you get a soup.

4. Snickers Salad
The church classic of candy bars and whipped cream. Is this dessert? Maybe. Who said you cannot have desert for a salad? No one. No one ever said that. Anything is a salad if you look at it the right way. It’s just things you put together.

3. Ham On Plate
Ham on plate. Lettuce like leaves. Meat isn’t murder. Vegetables are a lie.

2. Al Gore
Eating Al Gore may not be an option for most men but, if it is an option for you, then you have secured yourself one of the finest vegan salads in the world.

1. Tuna Niçoise
A Nice salad. You have eggs and anchovies and cherries and tuna. Add some mean beans and this salad is for you, man. Chomping on tuna. Lettuce is life. Follow this up by eating a sandwich. No salad alone is a proper salad for a man.

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