Design: This car is very round and very not Civic. Everyone knows what Civics are—and this is not a Civic. I found this Honda in the back of a fucking Quaker church in Santa Monica that I pass every day and I have always been like, “Huh? What the fuck foreign Honda is that?” Apparently it’s just an old, fifth generation Civic.
Aesthetic: Rounded ass Honda that should be dead.
Features: It’s white and it’s old and the windows are tinted, which is illegal in Los Angeles. That’s impressive. The tires are small and cute and, even though this isn’t really a feature, it’s age makes it not seem like a Honda at all. I’m sure the “DX” means something, too.
Honda Dayness: Not at all. It doesn’t even look like a Honda.
How Happy Does This Honda Make Me? Quite happy! It doesn’t seem on brand for Honda which is ironic because I was entirely on brand for myself by wearing a gay ass outfit that was almost entirely J.Crew. The one day I’m basically a brand whore I’ve met my opposite match: a Honda that barely seems like a Honda.